Nothing else, just peace

It’s a brand-new year with brand-new challenges. Since 2017 was really not a good year for so many people, but 2018 will be way better. After all, could things really get worse?

I thought I would start the new year with some paraprosdokians – those figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected, and is often humorous. Winston Churchill loved them. Here goes:

• Where there is a will, I want to be in it.

• The last thing I want to do is hurt you – but it’s still on my list.

• Since light travels faster that sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

• If I agree with you, we’d both be wrong.

• We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.

• War does not determine who is right, only who is left.

• Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a salad.

• To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

• I didn’t say it is your fault, I said I was blaming you.

• You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

• I used to be indecisive, but now I am not so sure.

• To be hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

• Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian anymore than standing in the garage makes you a car.

• You’re never too old to learn something stupid.

• I’m supposed to respect my elders, but it’s getting harder and harder for me to find one now.

Now that you had a bit of a giggle, I want to know what your resolutions are for the year. I want peace; that is all, just peace. Let us know at roelienv@caxton.co.za.

Until next week, may each and everyone of our loyal readers have a peaceful, prosperous and an extremely happy new year.

Take care of one another.

Ciao